Crash! New Source of Paralyzing Anxiety

I’ve been doing so well since the surgery. Some numbness, but minimal pain and almost no bleeding or oozing at all. It’s great! I’m starting to realize the difference between having teeth extracted by a dentist (at least the ones I’ve seen) and an oral surgeon (at least the one that did my procedure). Dentists cut the gums and rip out the teeth, leaving an exposed socket and bone. The surgeon preserved as much of my gums as possible and sutured them together after removing the teeth.

During my post-op exam, the surgeon explained the numbness I’ve been experiencing was caused by loss of a tooth that was pressing hard on a nerve. He says it should gradually decrease with time as the nerve repairs itself and becomes accustomed to not having pressure on it.

The new hole in my head is a different story. Apparently it was pretty big. He sutured a flap of skin over it, but it could open up if I blow my nose, drink through a straw, chew something the wrong way, or sneeze without opening my mouth. If it does open up, I will have stuff coming out my nose whenever I swallow and will need additional surgery to close it up again. Lovely! I’m under orders not to do any of those things for at least two weeks.  With my allergies and constant sinus congestion, it won’t be a fun two weeks. Essentially I can do nothing but be a couch potato. Any activity raises risk of inhaling dust or any number of other airborne offenders which might trigger allergic reactions and a long sneezing session. I’m too afraid to move about or eat anything even semi-solid. I’m terrified I will get too close to someone with a cold.

If I know myself, and I’m pretty sure I do after 47 years, these fears won’t subside after two weeks, or three, or four. I suspect I will be paralyzed by fear and anxiety about this for months, waiting until I’m positive it has had enough time to heal permanently. I’m sitting here thinking about my house not having a door on it, two walls incomplete, another wall lacking proper protection from the weather, and the fact that winter will be here before I know it. Any attempt to do anything more to the house would mean high risk of encountering allergens, so the status today is likely to remain until Spring. Even my usual cold weather hobby projects are on the hazards list.